IP
no cabeçalho, pintura de Paul Béliveau
Das conferências de imprensa dos Beatles:
Press: Does it bother you that you can't hear what you sing during concerts?
John: No, we don't mind. We've got the records at home.
Press: How did you find America?
John: Turn left at Greenland.
Press: Are you a mod or a rocker?
Ringo: I'm a mocker.
Press: Are you afraid military service might break up your careers?
John: No. There's no draft in England now. We're going to let you do our fighting for us.
Press: Are you going to have a leading lady for the film you're about to make?
Paul: We're trying to get the Queen. She sell in England, you know.
Press: Are you scared when crowds scream at you?
John: More so in Dallas than in other places, perhaps.
Press: Are you wearing wigs or real hair?
Ringo: Hey, where's the police?
Paul: Take her out!
George: Our hair's real. What about yours, lady?
Press: Aren't you tired of all the hocus-pocus? Wouldn't you rather sit on your fat wallets?
Paul: When we get tired we take fat vacations on our fat wallets.
Press: Beethoven figures in one of your songs. What do you think of Beethoven?
Ringo: I love him. Especially his poems.
Press: Can we look forward to any more Beatle movies?
John: Well, there'll be many more but I don't know whether you can look forward to them or not.
Press: Do any of you have ulcers?
George: None that we've noticed.
Press: Do you ever think of getting a haircut?
Paul: No, luv. Do you?
Press: Do you fight amongst yourselves?
John: Only in the mornings.
Press: Do you have any special advice for teenagers?
John: Don't get pimples.
Press: Do you have any special message for Dutch youth?
John: Tell them to buy Beatle records.
Press: Do you like topless bathing suits?
Ringo: We've been wearing them for years.
Press: Do you plan to record any anti-war songs?
John: All our songs are anti-war.
Press: Do you speak french?
Paul: Non.
Press: Do you wear wigs?
John: If we do, they must be the only ones with real dandruff.
Press: Do you worry about smoking in public? Do you think it might set a bad example for your younger fans?
George: We don't set examples. We smoke because we've always smoked. Kids don't smoke because we do.
They smoke because they want to. If we changed we'd be putting on an act.
Ringo (whispering): We even drink.
Press: Does all the adulation from teenage girls affect you?
John: When I feel my head start to swell, I look at Ringo and know perfectly well we're not supermen.
... acerca da Filosofia do século XVII.
Muito engraçada, apesar das imprecisões e simplismos.
The images in this article have been excerpted from Steven Nadler and Ben Nadler's book, Heretics!: The Wondrous (and Dangerous) Beginnings of Modern Philosophy.
(via The Atlantic)
via pinterest
INSTAGRAM
Instagram photo by Min • Oct 13, 2016
A história engraçada vem a partir do minuto 2.50.
(1) Stay in bed until noon.
(2) Stay in a well-heated room, thinking about philosophy.
(3) Don't go to Stockholm today, even if the Queen of Sweden invites you.
via Philosophy Now
via dose.com
(deve ser giro fazer transcrições de certos casos 😃)
These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
__________________________
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
__________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
__________________________
ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
__________________________
ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years.
__________________________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget..
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
__________________________
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
__________________________
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He's 20, much like your IQ.
__________________________
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?
__________________________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid
__________________________
ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
__________________________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death..
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
__________________________
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.
__________________________
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
__________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
__________________________
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral...
__________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
__________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?
__________________________
And last:
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No..
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
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thatwasfunny.com
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